It's Kongye, Bitch

I won't start this blog off with a mission statement or an explanation of any kind. The fact is, we have no idea where this is going. To kick things off we'll do some reviews of the pilots we saw at the Paley Center's recent TV Preview Parties. First, let's talk about these "parties." Overall, these screenings were very nice. It was a free wine and cheese followed by the chance to see a bunch of TV shows before they air.

Thank you Paley Center of Media.

Just because we had a good time doesn't mean Kongye Weiss won't nitpick about everything that went wrong. That's not our style. The waiting line was epic; mostly because of one very special guest star- Lord Douchington of the 21 Club. Douchington was so impressive that we will devote an entire post to him later on. In fact, Kongye Weiss may make a special trip to the 21 Club at some point just to pay him a visit. Moving on to the catering. The food was free and had no visible evidence of spoilage so we'll leave it alone. The biggest problem with the food was likely the heards that attacked it as soon as the doors opened. Those italian cookie trays never stood a chance. Kongye was still able to successfully create a light dinner by foraging on leftover cheese and crudites.



The bar was epic. We arrived for the ABC party ready to get blitzed after dropping $9 each at Bobby Flay's Bar Americain on beers that would've cost us $5 at any other bar. Kongye was hoping to see Bobby Flay battle a ninja for a glass of OJ with ice while reading a dossier with a clip art rendition of a disgusting regional food item; but we were out of luck. I call Bobby and his wife surf 'n turf because she is a fine, delicious piece of meat, and he resembles a lobster.



Ok, back to the topic at hand. The Paley Center provided plenty of wine to help with my missions and this half of Kongye definitely got buzzed at that first screening. The PC came up with some brilliant strategies to slow down my consumption of wine at future screenings. The wine got more and more disgusting at each screening. At ABC it was pretty standard bad, cheap wine. At NBC it began to be actively unpleasant, CBS's dose had quite the burn as it went down, and by the time the CW party came around Kongye only accepted the wine because the bar had been replaced with 2 low tables that made it impossible for the bartenders to piss in some wine glasses and claim it was white wine (a theory we developed the night before about what the wine would evolve into).