I'm Addicted to Reviewing Stuff

So the State of New York is forcing Kongye to sit through a 5 hour course that should be titled "Driving Advice for Complete Fucking Idiots." What has she learned so far?
-Buckling your seat belt is safer than not buckling up.
-Teens are irresponsible little shits. Don't let them in get into cars together.
-Try not to fall asleep behind the wheel. If you want to take a nap, don't get into a car.
-Drunk driving isn't a good idea. But it is fun to watch a bunch of medical students trying to do it.
-Don't drive an actual blindford on. It looks like fun; but I was led to believe it would be a bad idea.
-Those crash test dummies that were so cool when I was a child of the 80's are actually really annoying now that I'm not entertained by random loud noises.
- The 80's were not kind to anyone. Acid wash, perms, and mom jeans- 'nuf said.
-In Sweden drunk driving gets you 1 year hard labour. Methinks I need to send Boyfriend back to his homeland. It would be fun watching him chop wood shirtless in July. On second thought, I'll just turn the thermostat way up the next time he works out and save on airfare.
-In El Salvador they execute you by firing squad for drunk driving. Someone should tell Paris and Lilo that there's a hot new club in San Salvador.